Do I amplify a problem when I observe and judge a situation? Does my judgement alter the outcome?
Say I am a bystander to an angry exchange between two people and I observe the exchange. If I make silent judgements upon the behaviour in front of me do I amplify the anger and therefore magnify and influence the outcome? I believe we absolutely do, much more than we realise. Which leads to my next question: am I then as culpable as those involved in the exchange by adding my invisible energetic fuel to the fire?
For me to judge I firstly have to emotionally disconnect from what I am seeing which numbs me to the discomfort of the exchange. I then have to see myself as completely separate from what I am observing which dissolves any potential human compassion or deeper understanding of what is really in front of me. To judge I must become aloof and when I become aloof I am controlling others (those not familiar with aloofness please refer my earlier three post on control dramas).
Hence I believe that my behaviour despite having no direct role in the angry exchange influences the outcome. The person we are judging will feel the weight of the judgment on top of the emotions already fired up in the exchange and may amplify their feeling of being under attack. On the flip side, if I observe the conflict can I then defuse the situation by not attaching to the situation with judgement but rather staying in compassion and acceptance?
I believe we can.