What is real Power?

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We live in a world where the true concept of power has become distorted. We see power as our ability to control others and attempting to control what is happening around us. I firmly believe this is a dishonest, manipulative, fearful and exhausting way to live.

My understanding of real power has four components.

1. Control of myself
2. Trust in myself
3. Faith in myself
4. Belief in myself

In percentage terms of my total power;

Control is 90%
Trust is 5%
Faith & belief are 2.5% each.

It’s like a domino; If I don’t have control of myself I can’t trust myself and if I don’t have control and trust in myself, it’s impossible for me to have faith and belief in myself.


As control is the largest component of power let’s begin there.

When we are born, we give control over to our parents. This is natural law. They decide everything for us, from where we live, to the food we eat, the language we speak, the country we live in, our religion and our beliefs. We are a blueprint of our parents, as they are of the people that raised them. Ideally when we become teenagers we should begin to take control back from our parents and others, but the reality is that we never do.

As a consequence of having given so much of our control away in order to survive and have our needs met, we become controlling. The less control I have of myself the more controlling I become of others.

Let me explain it like this:
I need 100% control to function. We can compare our power/control to a bank account. I need €100 in my bank account to keep it open. If I lend €95 I will then have to borrow €95 from someone else to keep my account open.

Likewise if I give 95% of the control of my life away I will have to control the people around me in order to survive.

If you want the sugar coated version I could tell you that we borrow others control (life force), but in reality, we steal it from each other. The main problem with this is that people give away what they don’t want – so if they are angry, fearful, in pain etc, we take it like a direct download into our bodies.

There are many consequences to this exchange. I believe that on average 90-95% of what we feel on a given day has absolutely nothing to do with us!

In contrast, when I am in control of my life, I determine how I feel and how I respond to life. Rather than trying to control what life brings to me.
To clarify: When I have control of my life I am responsible for my life, when I am not in control of my life I will blame someone else.


When we talk about trusting or not trusting someone, that places the onus on someone else. When I listen to my own instinct or intuition, I take full responsibility. If for example, I feel that someone is not trustworthy – that should be enough. I have been warned by my internal guidance. If they later prove to be untrustworthy, then I must take responsibility for not heeding the warning. Likewise, if I tell someone that I trust them, I am putting a burden on them.


Faith is the belief that whatever I need in life I can have. Belief is the willingness to accept it.

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