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Co-Dependency

Co-Dependency

The people who know me are probably aware that gardening isn’t my greatest skill. I am always amazed and awed when the flowers, shrubs or vegetables I plant actually grow! 
However when I first moved into my home, I had a great spurt of energy and enthusiasm to plant my garden.  

In one corner I planted two small trees side by side. I have no idea what species they were and even less of a clue now as to what they should be named. You see, over the years as a result of planting them so close to each other, they have grown together and into each other. The roots are entwined and neither can now live without the other.  

Sadly, neither the tree or their original species has thrived or grown into its full potential, they have both lost their identity. I am not even sure which tree has dominated the other. Its a whole new species of tree that perhaps the botanical gardens would be interested in. It certainly is a one off.  

The once upon a time two trees, now only one,  has been teaching me about co-dependency. 

 
Every time I look at this tree, I question what happens to us when we don’t give ourselves enough space to grow. When we see ourselves as an extension of another or over identify with a group – regardless of the nature of the relationship (family, marriage, friends). What happens when we never break free of the dominating family tree laden with beliefs and conditioning that are passed down for generations. Conditioning that forces us to become less, in order to fit in rather than thrive.  
 
I believe that the times we are living in are about exactly this. We are being taught to unravel our roots so that we can replant ourselves in more fertile and fresh ground. Ground where we can create healthier beliefs and break toxic cycles that are repeating in our families and groups globally. We must turn our backs on the old outdated conditioning that chokes our growth. We must move to new ground where we can grow into our full potential and discover our unique identity. 
 
This process isn’t always easy or pretty, but for a new earth to thrive and the madness to subside, we need to plant new seeds, behaviours and belief systems.